KNOWING YOUR COLORS

What a color consultation taught me about making decisions in every area of life — and why knowing your criteria changes everything.

Forty years ago a dear friend and I had our colors done at a home party. You may remember the era — everyone gathered while a consultant draped fabric swatches over your shoulders and declared what season you were. I came out an Autumn. Teal and rust were my colors. Gray and burgundy were not.

I didn't fully appreciate what that meant until I went home and looked at my closet. Hanging there was a gray wool suit I had spent a small fortune on in 1979. Beautiful fabric. Perfect fit. And every single time I wore it, someone would say "What a great suit" — immediately followed by "Are you feeling okay?" I looked sickly in it. I just hadn't known why until someone held the right colors up to the light.

That afternoon changed how I shop. But more importantly, it changed how I think about decisions.

Here is what I learned that day that has nothing to do with clothing: without knowing what actually fits you, every rack looks the same. Every option seems equally possible. You bring things home that look reasonable in the store and wonder later why they never quite work.

The colors consultation gave me a filter. And a filter changes everything — not because it limits your options, but because it focuses them. When you know your criteria in advance, you stop wasting time on what was never going to suit you.

I've watched this principle work in every area of life I've paid attention to. When my daughter was eighteen, walked onto a car lot and rattled off every feature she wanted. The salesman came back in minutes with exactly the right car. She'd had years of road trips to think about what a vehicle actually needed to do. She had criteria. She knew her colors.

Another friend was building a beautiful home and his wife asked him to help choose kitchen cabinet knobs. After working through the style, she asked which of ten back plates he preferred. He told her to choose whatever she liked and send him the bill. He had no criteria for cabinet hardware — and knowing that saved him hours of misery.

The question worth sitting with is this: in the areas of your life that feel most uncertain or exhausting — your relationships, your work, how you spend your time and energy — do you know your colors? Do you have a filter, a set of honest criteria, that tells you quickly what fits and what makes you look sick?

If not, that's where the real work begins. Not in making better choices, but in knowing yourself well enough to recognize one when it's standing in front of you.

To schedule a complimentary consultation: ruth@gracegardenhealing.com